traveled to so many places i only could dream about before
made many friends in London
settled in and doing well in my job
went to Wimbledon - TWICE - and saw Rafael Nadal
learned how to deal with difficult situation while travelling
learnt that if someone is negative towards you, it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them
went to therapy again - made many discoveries about myself, and my upbringing and how that affects me as an adult
learnt that healing takes time, you cannot put a time limit or a goal of when you want to be whole again, you just need to put yourself in the right mindset and be ready to do the work and to go through all the messiness of healing
that i am not pathetic if you still miss you - you are only human
learnt how to make many of my favourite dishes in lockdown
learnt that I don’t need to rely on anyone emotionally, I have myself and that is enough
If people want to leave your life, it’s not personal, they might just need space
Goals
healing
letting go
being present and self-aware
take more time for myself
respond rather than react
to welcome pain and to understand pain helps us grow and gives us new perspective
so you dated the wrong person and learned a hard lesson. you chose the wrong major and had to start over again. you cherished a friend who backstabbed you. it sucks, but it’s also going to work out. that’s life; you learn, hurt, love, cry, laugh, and keep going. you experience setbacks and you grow and it’s all okay.
• I fell I love with that same boy and he fell in love with me
• I loved him with every part of me, and I lost myself
• I lived in complete bliss for 4 years but I hated myself
• finally did my first big Europe trip I’ve always dream of
• thought I found my dream house with my boy
• I lost a friend
• figured out my career pathway
• went through two job redundencies
• seen Rafael Nadal THREE times which includes a Wimbledon quarterfinal fuck yeah
• I experienced real heartbreak, because he didn’t want me anymore
• I moved to London
•I started living the European lush life
• I learnt how to grow, how to accept, how to grieve and most important learnt (and still learning) how to heal
This decade taught me to be grateful for the good and the bad things, the highest and the most painful moments. I sometimes wish for the pain to go away and my life to go back to the way things were, but I can’t. I miss you everyday, and I wish you didn’t hurt me.
